


Reckoning

by cypheroftyr



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fix-It, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-09 08:05:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3242384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cypheroftyr/pseuds/cypheroftyr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fenris and Carver come to Skyhold. Garrett and Cullen might want to run for it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Miss me?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wargoddess](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wargoddess/gifts).



> This has been bugging me since DAI came out. The whole Hawke leaves behind their LI/Carver or Bethany is allowed to be shuttled off by Aveline which is bullshit.

Garrett Hawke didn’t fear much, especially after taking on the Arishok, blood mages, and the late Knight-Commander of Kirkwall but the two men he saw coming up the stairs towards Skyhold made his stomach drop.

His sibling, and lover both looked fit to be tied, both of them seething as they climbed the steps towards the main hall. Neither cared that servants, nobles and denizens of the Keep scurried out of their way. Both Fenris and Carver Hawke had men to see and fights to have, others be damned.

Cullen was next to him, words slowed then stopped as he spied Carver, dark hair, hazel eyes dark with rage as he spotted the man. Joining the Wardens had been good for Carver, being dragged off by Aveline apparently had disagreed with him. He wasn’t sure if he should flee or stand ready to face the wrath Carver carried with him.

“If we run now, maybe we can make it to Nevarra in a week?” Hawke offered as he stepped back without thinking. His eyes widened as he took in the sleek blue and grey armor his lover now wore, the massive two-hander he carried as if it weighed nothing. There was a story as to why Fenris wore the double gryphon but he wasn’t sure he could take the telling. He’d left him in the dead of night like a thief, a hastily scrawled note instead of words over a drink and breakfast. 

“I don’t think Nevarra is far enough Champion, both men seem ready to have their say and we owe it to them. Especially if Fenris had to join the Grey, and your brother seems to want my attention as well.”

“At least we’ll be roasted together, if that means anything.” Hawke said before he was shoved backwards over a table. 

“You dare do this Hawke? After all we have been through? You leave me in the middle of the night to come here? To save a world that didn’t even care enough to let you live? After all the shit we survived after Kirkwall? You would do this to me...to us?” Fenris’ words struck Hawke as surely as a blow, because the elf didn’t raise his voice, not once though he wanted to scream.

“I...Fenris, I didn’t think you’d want to come with ---” Hawke’s words died in his throat at the way Fenris’ expression shifted before him. Pain, hurt, anger, all flitted over the elf’s face before he closed down to something akin to stone.

“Save it, save it Garrett. Just stop with the excuses. It’s too late, in case you failed to notice the lovely blue and grey I’m now wearing.” Fenris snapped finally, his voice raised enough to carry back to where Varric had hurried in alongside the others.

Cullen wasn’t having much better luck with Carver, not when he’d been pinned into an alcove, words of hurt and betrayed trust pelting him instead of silverite covered fists.

“You did me worse than Hawke, you just up and left and I don’t even get a letter. At least he left Fenris a damned note. I thought you were dead, if it weren’t for some idle chatter we heard while on the road I’d have thought you gone Cullen. Gone without so much as a goodbye, I’m sorry ,nothing!” Carver slammed his palms against the stonework, his voice rough with the words he couldn’t speak, not there, not in front of the others.

“Please...let’s not give them a show. Can we go to my quarters? I’ll explain if you let me, please Carver.” Cullen begged softly as he dared to rest his hand on the back of his lover’s neck, fingers curled into the thick, dark hair as if he’d just rolled over that morning to greet him instead of long months before.

Carver made a noise in the back of his throat, not a whine, definitely not a moan but it was _something_ that hit Cullen hard. “Fine, let’s go. Besides, Fenris isn’t going to let Hawke get a word in anyway.” 

“I almost feel sorry for him, come on then, hopefully you’ll let me get my side done before you tell me to piss off.” Cullen sighed as he pulled away and headed back out, right past everyone assembled to gawk at the four of them. 

“Don’t he made that pot of stew, let him boil in it. I hope you’ve got decent Fereldan beer in this place.” Carver muttered as they skirted everyone still watching his brother and Fenris argue.

Maximillian, Varric and Dorian watched their fight escalate until it seemed that half of Skyhold had stopped to witness it. Only the Altus caught some of the swears that flew from the elven warden, enough that he didn’t dare translate. He didn’t even think some of the things the warrior had threatened were possible. 

Thankfully Cassandra hadn’t shown up, else there would be another after Hawke’s hide. Finally Max got between them with a few harsh words of his own for disrupting the routine.

“Apologies Inquisitor, I certainly didn’t expect this to happen.” Garrett mumbled as he edged away from Fenris, unsure if the elf would follow through on his threats.

“Take this to your room or somewhere besides the main hall. And stay away from Cassandra, she’ll have your tail if she catches you. I know you’ve been avoiding her.” Max said as he waved them off towards the upper level.

Fenris gave his own apologies before he turned to follow Hawke out and towards wherever the former hero had been put up. He wasn’t done, not by a long shot.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both Hawke and Cullen get it and not in a good way. Also one more chapter to go instead of this being the end.

Carver let Cullen pull him into his office without much resistance. Truth be told his anger had mostly burned off by the time he’d seen the former templar commander. He wasn’t as vitriolic as his elven friend but he wasn’t ready to let Cullen off the hook either. He took over the thick leather chair as he watched the blond walk around his office.

“Cull, just spit it out. We could be open before not like this.” Carver offered.

“Don’t call me that, it’s...too much right now.” Cullen begged before he resumed his pacing.

“Be glad I didn’t call you a misbegotten whoreson when I laid eyes on you. What happened? Why did you up and go? Didn’t I at least deserve a letter, a kiss goodbye, something?” Carver asked as he watched his...lover, former lover, friend? Whatever they were now, pace back and forth between the doors, around the desk and him, always a bit out of reach.

“I...have no excuse Carver. I felt the need to go, and I thought you wouldn’t follow. Couldn’t follow due to your oath to the Wardens. I thought it easier if you hated me for running like a coward. I see I made an error in judgement.” the former templar finally stopped before Carver and waited for him to do or say something.

To his credit, Carver didn’t explode in anger or stalk off. He pondered the month between their last night together and where they could go from this tense reunion. He stood and wrapped his arms around his knight, his errant lover and hoped Cullen would return his embrace. 

Soon enough he felt strong arms around him and heard the repeated apology mixed with his name before the commander pulled back to stare at him, hopeful that they still had a chance. Carver didn’t pull free, but he gave the other man a long, searching look before speaking.

“You can’t do this again. You can’t just up and leave me like a damned thief Cull. No more sneaking off, no more lies. I thought every possible bad thing had happened, especially when no one could tell me where you’d gone off to, or wouldn’t. If I hadn’t heard about Hawke meeting up with this Herald of yours, we’d still be in the dark. Do you understand you damn fool?” the brunet ran his fingers through the loose waves that he’d missed seeing so tousled first thing in the morning.

The Inquisition’s commander leaned into the gentle touch with a pleased noise, almost a purr if anyone asked. He glanced up at Carver, saw the intense way he was being watched, like prey and shuddered. “No more lies, if duty calls for it I will not run from you again Carver. You have my word, upon my honor and my life. I would return to you if you’ll have me.” 

“Yeah, I’m running my hands through your hair and you’re damn near swooning in my arms, I think that means you’re ok.” Carver laughed as he saw the way Cullen glared at him. 

“I do not swoon, nor do I...just...thank you for hearing me out. I never felt alright as I did but once I’d fled I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t think you’d forgive me, that it could be...that we could return to each other once I’d run away.” Cullen pulled back reluctantly, a smile on his face for his returned lover. 

“Hey, you don’t get to just pull away and give me that damned grin. Not when I’ve rode hell for leather to get to you. You also owe Fenris an apology, for not sending him word where Hawke was at. But he can get that out of you later, assuming they haven’t screamed the Keep down.” Carver took his former templar’s hand and tugged him back towards the door. 

“Show me where the baths are and then food. Now that I’m not ready to take your head off, I could really use a hot soak and something hearty to eat. Warden appetites and all that.” He pulled the blond to his arms and nuzzled at him as if Cullen were on the menu. “You know you missed the perks of being with a warden Cull, let’s fix that later?”

“Yes, lets. After we get you cleaned up and fed serah.” Cullen reluctantly stood back and led them to the officers wing so Carver could get the perks that his lover’s rank afforded him. Being so far away from the others meant they missed the spectacle of Hawke and Fenris arguing all the way to Hawke’s rooms.

**

Hawke flinched with every curse flung at him in Tevinter and Trade as they made their way through the halls. He knew he deserved the elf’s anger but even he had a limit of how much he’d stand to be screamed at as they went. He finally wheeled on the warrior as if he was going to strike him down, instead he lashed out with words, for once.

“Fenris shut up, shut up, shut up! You have every right to be angry with me. But Andraste’s tits can you stop berating me every goddamned step of the way? We could have been in my room with a silence spell up by now if you could hold your piece for five minutes.” Invictus’ eyes widened as he saw how the elf held his words for a moment, his eyes dark and his expression murderous.

“Move, make it fast. Then I will continue to have my say Invictus Endrin Hawke. You do not get to say a word about leaving me behind. Be thankful to whatever you believe in I did not simply pluck your heart from your chest to let you feel how much you hurt me that night. Now walk.” Fenris followed Hawke all the way to his rooms and the second the door was shut he resumed his ranting.

“How dare you, how bloody well dare you Hawke? You not only leave me, you leave with a note in the middle of the night to save these ungrateful fools? Who would use you and leave you behind once they’d gotten all they needed from you? Will nothing satisfy you Invictus? After all we’ve been through you leave me like that?!” Fenris paced as he yelled, his hands clenching and unclenching as he paced.

“Well! What do you have to say for yourself? Mabari got your damned tongue? After that display in the hall be glad you still draw breath. You … you!” Fenris threw his hands up in frustration before he found a chair to fling himself into, anger making every movement, every fidget hard to watch.

Hawke drew a breath, sent a prayer to Andraste and tried to explain. “I didn’t think… I, fuck Fen--” 

“Damn right you didn’t think. Do you know what went through my head when I woke up to your note?” Fenris had reached into a pouch and waved the brittle parchment at Hawke. “This, this was all you thought I was worth after ...after so many years together? After all we’ve … a fucking piece of parchment is all you left to explain Hawke? How could you?” the elf’s voice wavered before he flung the note at Invictus, finally slumping in a chair, hand over his face as he tried to compose himself. 

“Fenris...it’s not that. It’s, that...I didn’t want you to get dragged into it again. You have always complained about my choices, I thought I’d be giving Varric information and coming back. I thought it would be as fast as I could make it. But just in case...I didn’t want you to be waiting. We’d have found each other again. Please, please believe me. You are worth everything to me, and I fucked that to the Black City with how I left. I’m sorry, it’s all I have if you’ll take it.” Hawke knelt before the warrior, slipping his fingers between the elf’s free hand and squeezing gently. 

“I beg you Fenris, hear me. If you can forgive me and whatever happened to you since I left I will leave with you and we can go to Nevarra as planned.” Hawke’s voice was soft as he tried to get through to the other man.

“In case it escaped your notice, I’m not exactly free to come and go as I please any longer. I’m beholden to the Order. They saved me when I got caught out running with Carver. I wasn’t fast enough, and a darkspawn’s dagger nearly was the end of me. As it was, I thought I was through the Veil when Carver helped me off the floor once I’d survived the Joining. They may even be looking for us as deserters as far as I know.” Fenris looked at their joined hands and sighed.

“What can we do now? If they don’t try and drag us back for desertion, I will have to return eventually. I owe them my life Hawke and I can’t ignore that debt even to remain.” Fenris leaned back and tugged his gauntlets free before taking his mage’s hand.

“I don’t know. If they’ll let me, I’ll come with you. I mean, my old title should be worth something right? I don’t think the Inquisitor will want me around after the spectacle we made. Just one thing Fenris and we can go ok? Question is, will you let me stay by your side?” Vic slid to the side and let his cheek rest against the cool silverite of the elf’s armor as they considered their options.

“I really don't have an answer. I’m still not satisfied with your reasons Invictus. I’m also tired and heartsick, and damned hungry. I hate that part of it, the gnawing emptiness if you don’t eat enough. Worse than when I was a slave.” Fenris said before he pulled free so he could get more armor off. “Where’s the baths?”

“Follow me...lo--” Hawke fell silent at the glare from the elf.

“Not yet, I am still weary Hawke. Just let me take a bath, show me to a room and I need to rest. I’m tired, so damn tired now that I’ve had my say.” Fenris let his pauldrons drop, his vambraces and chest piece followed. “I’ll get them after a bath.” 

“You don’t have to ...stay away. I have missed you, please don’t take a separate room from me. Please?” Vic begged.

“I should punch you in the fucking mouth, but I’m too tired. Fine, I don’t care. Just point me to a bathing chamber so I can get cleaned up and fall on my face for a few hours. Then I’ll see how I feel about you Hawke.” the elven warrior caught the look on Hawke’s face but he didn’t care. Not after the Void he’d been through since the mage had run from him. 

He took a quick bath, not even taking time to appreciate the opulent tub or dwarven plumbing. As soon as he was clean, he hopped out, followed Invictus back to his room, and true to his word hit the bed and was out for several hours. He opened his eyes to a dimly lit room and Invictus sat at the table with a book. “Vic?”

“Got you food, they don’t have all your favorites but I got you a double portion, ale and some bread. Let me know if you want me to warm it.” Invictus replied, his gaze on his book. He’d wondered if they would survive his foolishness and considering the way Fenris had snapped he didn’t know what to expect.

“Why are you turned from me? You practically begged me to stay, yet you remain apart from me.” Fenris said as he joined the other man. 

“Been thinking while you slept and wondering if we can get past this. Just...being cautious is all. I already fucked up with you, so I guess I’m just watching my step is all.” Vic said before he reached over to warm the stew for the elf. 

“Stop, being melodramatic never suited you. Once I’ve eaten let’s go to sleep. We can speak more in the morning.” Fenris dug into his meal, too happy to have a hot dish and a cold drink to speak until the bowl was emptied. “Now, let’s go to bed and try to have a good nights sleep, we can talk more when I’m not ...tired and angry, deal?” 

“Deal.” Vic set their tray out, and crawled into bed first and once the elf joined him, he crashed out first. Fenris on the other hand lay on his back for hours, exhausted but too wound up to sleep until the sun was nearly up. Though rest came uneasy to the elf, he felt lighter of heart by the time he slipped into dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally got a snippet of inspiration after re-reading this.


End file.
